Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Parenting 101


We all do it. Those of us that are parents think our way is best. We have our own reasons, whether it's "that's the way my parents did it and I think I turned out ok" or "that's the way my parents did it and I swore I never would" or "the last 14 books on child-rearing I read said......" Whatever the reason, we have it and we stick by it. Now, on occasion, as parents, we throw our hands up and say "I don't know what I am doing wrong......What would you do?" At any rate, we are given advice and we give advice, sometimes solicited, sometimes not - but it's always there.

Those of you who are friends of mine on face book and who follow my blog know what my biggest parenting issues are: I don't do a great job of "picking my battles" (specifically with clothes and specifically with my 5 year old), I yell way too much and my 2 year old has SERIOUS sleep issues. I have read every book, asked the advice of everyone I know, tried LOTS and LOTS of stuff, but to no avail. Baby Remington is due in 4 weeks and 5 days (or a little more than 800 hours or a little over 1600 Hannah Montana episodes). I NEED SLEEP! My husband requires a ton of sleep, Sydney requires a ton of sleep and Harper....well, she likes to get up and play.....at 2:00 am. It usually lasts about 2 hours and then she drifts back off to sleep, but in those 2 hours she visits our room multiple times, typically about every 15 or 20 minutes. I am at my wit's end.

Last night some of my Pampered Chef girls and I were treated by our directors to appetizers at Ruth Chris Steakhouse where I was bombarded (after we talked business of course) by advice. None of it was bad. It was all just different than what I want to do. "Put her back in the crib", "Make a pallet on the floor", "You are too nice, let that kid cry".....I had a reason not to do any of those things. Aaron and I have settled on putting a childproof door knob on the inside of her door and shutting her in. I could tell that some of my PC peeps thought this was really cruel and unusual. It's ok that they thought that because, for whatever reason, in their mind it IS cruel and unusual. For me, the crib is not an option, the pallet is not an option and wandering the house is dangerous so it's what we've decided.

All this to tell you that I got a super sweet text from one of my PC peeps this morning telling me that she thought I was an awesome mommy and whatever worked for our family was what I should do. Thank you Emily Hand! I appreciate the fact that you recognized I might have been offended (P.S. I totally wasn't) and gave me an "atta girl". I listened to ALL the advice, but decided it's not for us and I hope no one thinks my locking her in her room is cruel and unusual punishment....if you do - I ask you to come spend the night one night :) - I think you'll change your mind. The beauty of good friends giving advice and taking advice is that I was not offended and they will not be offended that I don't take it. That's what I've learned in this parenting world. There is more than one way to skin a cat, or to get a kid to sleep at night. Pallets and crib returns work for some, locking the kids in their rooms work for others :). As for our family.... I'll keep you posted.

In the meantime, Harper, when you read this years from now I hope you are not scarred too badly and feel like you now have abandonment issues because we left you to figure out how to put yourself back to sleep without milk, nuggles, playing monkey or playing beauty shop in the wee hours of the morning. I hope you recognize that it's out of sheer love (and necessity) that this is the course of action we have taken. But mostly, I hope you outgrow your sleep issues in the years to come and one day see what a whole night's sleep feels like. I, myself, have forgotten, but to the best of my recollection.... It.Is.Wonderful!

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